If we would have met when I was in my early 20s and you would have asked “where do you see yourself in ten years”? My reply would have gone something like this, “Married, 4 or 5 kids, pastor’s wife, serving my Savior in my local church”. Simple vision, not glamorous, and, one would think, easily attainable.
Fast forward ten or so years and reality is very different from my dreams. Single. No kids (but, a dog that is spoiled rotten). Health Problems. Two Jobs. Going back to school. Serving my Savior in my local church. My plans and God’s plans were very different. Almost everything I’d hoped for hasn’t happened. (Spoiler: And I’m totally okay with that!)
I remember loving Carolyn McCulley in my early 20s. I loved her books , loved hearing her speak, and I regularly read her blog. ::Pause:: Shameless plug for Carolyn’s books. If you haven’t read them, do yourself a favor and buy one now! ::Pause Complete:: She was (and is) a role model to me on living a godly life as a single woman. There was only one thing I wished fervently as I listened to her countless times, “God, please, please don’t allow me to be an older single woman. I don’t want to be in my mid-30s and still be single.” I smile every time I think of this. The very thing I so desperately did not want is the very thing God, in His infinite wisdom, gave me.
So, what does all of this have to do with my blog? I have had a growing burden for single people, especially single women. There are some excellent books written on singleness. I mean, top-notch, biblical, out of the park books. But, few people seem to talk honestly about what it’s like to be a single Christian. And hardly anyone talks about the unique challenges of an older single Christian in a mostly married Christian culture. No one talks about the challenges, the joys, the hilarious stories, and the heartbreaking pain a single walks through. I have the unique privilege to be in a church that loves and cares for me deeply. But, I have watched other singles withdraw, leave, or listlessly attend churches that, in my opinion, don’t really know how to care for them.
But, before you think that my “new” blog is going to be a pity and bash the church party, think again. As difficult as my life has been, I wouldn’t trade it for anything! It has become the most beautiful, joy-filled, painful walk of faith. My relationship with my Savior has blossomed in ways I could have only imagined in my 20s. And there is NOTHING I love more that Christ’s bride, His Church. The last thing I ever want to do is smear mud on His bride.
So…what then, you might ask? I simply want to blog about life, raw unfiltered life. About the joys and struggles of being a Christian. Because I’m a Christian first and a single second. My prayer is that this blog is encouraging to young single women and to gracefully aged single women. I pray this blog will encourage married women. I know it can be hard to pray for, encourage, and support someone when you don’t understand where they are coming from. I pray this blog gives you a little insight into the head of at least one single woman (trust me we’re all different!). I also like to write and this blog is a helpful way to document my thoughts. I may not write all that consistently (two jobs and college makes things busy), but I hope and pray that what I write glorifies the Trinity and encourages a few people as they transverse this journey towards the Celestial City.