When I graduated high school I had to choose a “life verse” for the graduation ceremony. I chose Ps. 16:5-6. Years have passed and this verse has often been brought to mind by the Holy Spirit. It amazes me how the same verse can mean so much more over ten years later. When I graduated high school I had a life plan, what I thought my life would look like by the time I was in my 30s. I thought that I’d be married with a couple of kids. I thought my siblings would probably be married as well and though we’d most likely live in different cities, we’d always come back to Dad and Mom’s for the holidays. Just your typical happy American family. Now that I’m in my thirties, I just laugh. The words from the apostle James come to mind…
“Come now, you who say ‘Today or tomorrow we will go into such a and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit’ – yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring…you ought to say ‘If the Lord wills we will live and do this or that.'” James 4:13-15
We do our best to map out our lives, but in the end only God knows the future. We think we know what is the best plan; but over ten years later I can see in part why my plan wasn’t the best.
The American dream. Somehow we as Western Christians equate the American dream with the Christian reality. We think we deserve the perfect, happy life. And when things don’t go the way we want, we scream foul. God didn’t give this good little Christian what I deserve, so I have the right to become angry. After all it’s God’s fault…right? Not quite.
In the past two and a half years I’ve experienced more pain, hurt, and trial than I ever thought I’d experience in my lifetime. It’s felt like God took my life and let it all crumble at my feet. I’ve had quite the life lesson in my dreams vs. God’s plans. There’s a couple of things I’ve learned (and had to have beat into my thick head repeatedly :))…
- The only thing this rebellious sinner deserves is Hell.
- No where in Scripture does God promise me a care-free, happy life. God promises to sustain, give grace, provide for my needs (needs, not wants), bless, and do me good. But, blessing and good has MANY different forms and not all of them are of the flowers and butterfly variety.
- I was not created for this world and this world is not my Home. I am simply a wayfarer passing through. Why do I act like this world is everything when I’m only here for 100 years tops. After that everything on earth will pale in comparison with Heaven.
- I am a finite creature with an infinite Father. He is my Creator. He is my Redeemer and Savior. He has snatched me from the jaws of Hell and cleansed my sin stained soul. He gave his life for me. Not only does this prove that He loves me and knows what is best for me. But, I should want to do whatever He asks of me, I am forever indebted to my generous Savior. I should want to follow my Redeemer wherever He leads.
So, in 2013, nothing is like I thought. I’m still single, I have no job, I have no clue where my life is going. Life is SO different from I imagined. But, life is so good!!! I can say that my boundary lines have indeed fallen in pleasant places. Why?
- First and foremost because I am saved and have a personal relationship with my Creator and Savior. No matter the circumstances he never leaves and always gives sustaining grace. I am a Redeemed child of God! What Else really matters when you know you’re going to Heaven.
- I’m back to living in the country!!! I have my puppy, I have a house to take care of, and I’m roomies with my brother. What a sweet season.
- I’m back with my old church (that I love and missed) and back with many dear friends and making new ones.
- I live in the same city with my siblings (never thought that would happen once we all grew up) and I have a wonderful brother-in-law.
I could go on and on. Sure, things aren’t’ what I’d planned. Sure there are things I wish were different. Ever day I wake up and have to choose to walk by faith. But, I’m more certain of my Savior’s sovereign guidance, nearness, and care than I was two and a half years ago. He’s always taken care of me and He always will. I’ve never been more confident that all things will work for my God. God is always faithful to His promises. And even when I can’t see how it will turn to good, He’s promised in His Word that it will. He is God, He cannot lie.
My Abba Father knows me better than I know myself. He can see the future. He saved my soul, I trust Him to plan and guide my life. I can’t wait to see what 2013 brings!
He has promised. He is faithful.