The nature and depth of human pride are illuminated by comparing boasting to self pity. Both are manifestations of pride. Boasting is the response of pride to success. Self-pity is the response of pride to suffering. Boasting says, “I deserve admiration because I achieved so much.” Self-pity says, “I deserve admiration because I have suffered so much.” Boasting sounds self-sufficient. Self-pity sounds self-sacrificing.
The reason self-pity does not look like prides is that it appears to be so needy. But the need arises from a wounded ego. It doesn’t come from a sense of unrecognized worthiness. It is the response of unapplauded pride.
-John Piper, The Dangerous Duty of Delight